Miming the Me

Hey peeps!
I just threw my phone out of the window miffed by the alarmingly rising breed of self-obsessed people.
But before I begin to write this one, let me mention a few things in advance:
1. I am not a saint either, and do not claim to be free from these earthly shortcomings
2. I am not going to reveal any names. So you may resume reading if you were dreading finding your own name below, or you may run the fudge off if you came here for some juicy tidbits. This ain't no gossip blog ju girlies! :P *pretending a serious face*
3. Show some sense of humor and tell your inflated egos to practice laughing back at themselves, lest they burst back at you emulating the complex cellular process cell ingestion by lysosome (yeah, whatever, I know my biology well B) )

Anyway, so after the ritual of ambling off that is so commonplace with me, let us come back to the main ailment.
I am observing a very disturbing trend these days. As it is no mystery anymore that I am a software engineer (though i always fantasized always being an anonymous cool writer, known by the power of the words that she types away in a super cool manner enlightening masses on social media, but then I foiled that plan myself. Later on that, but again - an attempt at satisfying my inflated ego was one of the reasons behind that. ) and after a point in time, virtual world becomes the real world for this species and real world - well, it stops mattering anymore. Especially, when you can Google, rewind, fast forward, analyze, discuss, share, like, comment on all the "real" world event in the virtual world anyway.

And this trend is giving birth to a new disease - the obsession with the self, narcissistic tendencies as we call it. People only want to talk about one thing - them-effing-selves; and just in case they pause to listen, they only wanna listen again about them-screwed-selves.. Sharing their Selfies bathing, eating, making out, tagging on everyone in the friend list, hash-tagging every dumb combination of all the words in the dictionary..
There is a friend of me who sends me the images of his crush since a year, with cheesy words written below praising her, even in the midst of the night, but yes - call it a different case when I tell him to go ahead and propose her and he ends up wetting his pants in nervousness. I'm really considering compiling his list of mush-words and forwarding to his crush from my side, being the altruistic mutual friend that I am. I am pretty sure that would hit the nail on the head for the poor guy.
There is another one who, after a string of relationships, has gotten to writing poetry. I'm sure he would be a perfect soulmate for the Cancerian* crybaby Taylor Swift (though the author also wields a Cancerian sun sign, but she is above all these petty humane-sun-signs-stuff :P ).
And well yeah, did I tell you about the other one, who would call me but never let me utter more than two-and-a-half words! Well yes guys I love listening to how cool my friends are but a pause sprinkled here and there would be nice. And I really would not mind if you "actually" bother asking 'How am I' rather than using that just as a charade to start blabbering about the Super Awesome You.

Whoa! and writing this piece seems to be miring my ire well. Let me get back to the moonstruck guy and give him some words of praise (who wants words of wisdom anyway?! Phew).

Love to you all petals
Enigma

PS On a second revision, apologies for not asking at the start "How are You?" ;-)
* As it turns out based on the observation of an erudite reader, Taylor Swift does not have a Cancerian sun sign, rather a Cancerian moon sign. Bah! She still shows all the cry-baby-me-me traits of a perfect Cancerian. I always knew this sunsign stuff was a hocum ;) Thanks reader though. You're a saviour!